I'm back, ya'll!

Oy! How the eff did it get to be November 28th already? I've been away for so long. Too long, in fact. First, let me say, I'm sorry that I let you all down. I had so many of you asking me when I would come back, and I honestly didn't know the answer. I was frustrated. I was stressed beyond belief at work. I was cutting off a lot of things that were important to me because that's what I do. That's how I've always handled things that are "hard". I put hard in quotes because I don't think this particular journey is hard. It's different, but it's not that hard.

I certainly made it out to be harder than it needed to. It's not really that difficult to wake up at 6:30 and go to the gym. It's not that difficult to read a book instead of watch a movie. It's not that difficult to eat some healthy instead of something that can barely be called food. While all of you have been nothing but supportive, what I want you all to know is that I don't want to give up. I wouldn't have started this project if I thought that I was just going to quit. None of these things would be on my "to-do" list if I didn't want to do them in the first place.

What I have to keep reminding myself is that I'm trying to change my brain's programming after 29 years. I've spent my whole life on one track, and now I'm trying to leap to a completely alternate lifestyle. It's not supposed to be easy, change never is. But I want to find happiness and I don't want to waste my life sitting on my ass.

I can tell you right now that I don't know how many times I might fall down between now and August 20th, but I can tell you that I will always pick myself back up. I went to the gym this morning and reset my Couch to 5K back to Week 1 - Day 1. That in itself has given me a renewed sense of motivation. I also have to thank my friend Dave for a somewhat brutally honest conversation on Monday night that helped me realize how much I truly needed this project back in my life. I needed that, Dave, and I thank you. And thank you to all of the rest of you who have believed in me along the way as well. I'm back, yall. Watch out : )